Difficulty

Melissa has viewed pornography,
Melissa is suspicious that I may be looking at pornography.
I'm not, I haven't.
But she says to me 'I know you have, what would it hurt for you to have told me? I wouldn't be upset.'

She says this every time she gets suspicious.
Which makes me, in turn, want to view pornography, so I could tell her about it.
So she can trust me some more.

But I'm afraid of viewing it because I don't want to slip. And viewing it, just to tell her that I did, doesn't work either. Because she wants to know if I slipped.

Even typing about this now is starting to rouse demons in me.
Anyway, I'm going to go finish folding the laundry and make some dinner. I have a job interview with AMEX tomorrow (I missed the one on saturday, because I couldn't sleep friday night, at all), and I will hopefully get it, I have my neighbors information and I'm going to get a better job.

Also, I made a sale today at my work.